My Birthday

Today is my birthday. I think it will be a sad little day. Since dad died, events come along and I say to myself, "this is the first time I have done whatever or been where ever...etc. since dad died. I guess next year it will be better because I will stop saying that to myself every day- at least once. Its been almost two months, but it is just raw. The first few weeks I was just in shock. Now it is very real that he is not here. Like today, on my birthday. The first one without him. We went to Lagoon for Clay's birthday and that was a good day. The whole family went and we had fun. It was only till later that it was hard that he wasn't there when we had dinner and opened presents. We had so many good days like that. There won't be anymore "Yappy Barfday's."